the act of seeking out

 all images taken this weekend at Golden Gardens and Kayak Point

Sometimes I feel like I lead a double life.

The virtual one and the real one. The virtual life looks a bit different than the real one, yet it is all the same. It really comes down to what I share...isn't that the same for all of us really?

If using the Internet as ones sole point of reference...one could say I go a lot of places, complete a lot of projects, cook all the time, have a garden filled with beautiful flowers and enough downtime to photograph it all. Wow! What a life...could I be that girl? When I look at my own blog and my own Instagram feed I am often struck by how pretty, fun and full it all looks. It gets me thinking about perspective and how what you choose to share becomes the narrative.

So hows about a bit of truth with your morning cup of tea.

I am a homebody and not particularly social. I have a very small group of friends and most of them live in other places. I spend long stretches of the day not speaking to another human being. I work from home so my interactions are few. This lifestyle is mostly delightful to me as I have never been an extrovert. This does not mean that I am antisocial. Actually quite the contrary. I enjoy other people. I enjoy people watching. I enjoy engaging in animated conversations. I just don't seek it out.

I decided to make some changes in 2014. While I didn't feel the need to become a social butterfly. I did and do want to get out more. I want my everyday life to be more like the life I see in my own pictures. I want the fullness to be the rule rather than the exception. I treasure my quiet simple life...I truly do...but there's so much good stuff that comes with getting out and I can't expect all that good stuff to come to me. So far I have exceeded my own expectations. Both with Keith and without him, I have explored this great city...I have embarked on a road trip, I have visited new places and dined with new people. I have cooked different kinds of food and listened to different kinds of music. I have watched documentaries on subjects for which I never previously cared. I have played with my dog and wept with strangers. I see Keith doing the same...stretching himself in ways that make me proud and happy.

One of my goals is to visit a whole list of parks here in the PNW. The parks here will blow your mind, they are really that beautiful. Every time I visit one I return home feeling joy. Fresh air, trees and a nice long walk will do that I guess...who knew? 

In addition to the parks here are a few other things I want to do this summer:

Take a cooking class.
Have tea with a stranger.
Go to more movies.
Have a picnic with Keith in our backyard
See Mt Rainier up close
Rent a cabin with a hot tub;)

invent a signature cocktail
do a bit of painting
wear more dresses
take a yoga class

“Tell me, what is it you plan to do
with your one wild and precious life?”  
-Mary Oliver

the best smoothie evah

I like a hearty breakfast. If I can't stick a fork in it or scoop it up in a spoon my brain tells my stomach "you're still hungry, girl." I've been trying to change my mind when it comes to a lot of things, namely food and its been a major adjustment...especially when it comes to breakfast.

Now I'm not big into smoothies, I was never really into Jamba Juice or anything like that. I typically like my food in solid form, that was until I came across this smoothie. When people use to tell me "oh, this smoothie keeps me super full and energetic until lunch" I always thought "yeah, right." But I'm now that person and it's real guys...it's super real.

Enter the best smoothie evah:

1 medium banana: i chop it up and stick it in the freezer the night before
a handful of blueberries fresh or frozen cuz they're good for you
a half cup of reg milk or almond milk...whatever you drink
a big ol handful of spinach. YES. spinach
a drizzle of honey but i've gone without it
a spoon of ground or roasted flaxseed
and that's it. sometimes I add a spoon of almond butter it all depends.

my recipe is loosely based on this one

I want to try one of these greenies next.

it's hearty,  it tastes good and it keeps you full until lunch...at least my brain thinks so.

CONFESSION...

 when I refer to "diet" I am referring to a way of life, not a weight loss plan.

I'm DONE reading books about food. 

I started several months ago with one book. It wasn't recommended to me I just wanted to begin an approach to health that wasn't necessarily about shunning food, but understanding it and the role it plays in my overall wellness. I've read so many articles and heard so many opinions...I didn't want to just jump on the next trend.  I was looking for something more than just stories passed from one person to the next in a very elaborate and unreliable game of telephone.

The first book started off well enough. Authored by a lauded physician with credits a mile long. It was chock full of the clinical, scientific data I loved, but was it really the full story? I mean, I know what it's like in a research lab...there's a lot of data that comes out of any study and scientist are known to use what supports their position. I had no reason to be skeptical...except I was.

The following book was the exact opposite. Even spending some time refuting information in the first book. It encouraged a diet based on the foods cavemen ate. It made a lot of sense and the simplicity of the message was compelling to me...but whenever anyone advocates an all or nothing approach to food...well, the jury was still out. That was until it dropped the bombshell "beans are bad." HUH? Well, my mom is a Latina as was her mother before her as was my great grandmother a proud Mayan Indian. Beans are our thing. But, the book was good and I wasn't ready to fling the baby out with the bathwater. I had to be open to the idea that maybe something I thought was good really wasn't.

The next book I read was in complete or at least semi opposition to the two before and I remained on that train over the course of the next ten books. Back and forth with some overlap, some agreement, some disagreement. I was incredibly confused...what's good for me, what's bad for me, What do you mean the "organic" label means nothing and "cage free" doesn't really mean cage free? UGH!!!!!

I was beginning to feel a little crazy and helpless. Vegan, Paleo, Raw, No Gluten, Autoimmune, Vegetarian, Pescetarian, Flexitarian, Real Food. I'm sure there's more I've never even heard of. Should I just throw them all in a hat and draw one out and stick with it. Living off the land like a caveman isn't practical...not to mention the centuries of evolution separating us. Moving to a farm and raising my own shit might happen one day, but not today. Going to the farmer's market and spending 35 bucks on 2 pounds of local grass fed beef and uncured bacon does not fit my budget.

What I gleaned from my literary journey this past year is that everyone just does what he or she thinks is right. You can find a study, in some cases, lots of studies to support just about any idea. Gwyneth Paltrow does not hold the monopoly on health or achieving health. Data is highly subjective and highly prone to manipulation. I won't die if I don't juice or own a Vitamix. Corporations don't care about health they care about money...but so does everybody. If it comes in a box or a bag it's probably not great. Water is precious. A chicken mcnugget won't kill you....but a lot of them...who knows. Stress will most definitely kill you. The body is a most extraordinary vessel. Trust it for the truth for it will not lie to you. Don't eat the foods that make you feel like crap. Do eat the foods that make you feel awesome. I think that any of the aforementioned diets can produce happy healthy people. Good overall health means a lot more than fitting into skinny jeans...but skinny jeans can still be a part of it;)

In case you're interested here are some of the books I read...

The China Study, Eat the Yolks, The Omnivores Dilemma, In Defense of Food,
Animal, Vegetable, Mineral, Fast Food Nation, Real Food  etc.

In a follow-up to this post I will share more specifically how I eat and the changes I've made that have had some pretty positive results. None of the books I read addressed diet in terms of weight loss.  I'm still really figuring things out and have developed a true love and affinity for cooking. I thought this article kinda summed up how i feel about all of this.